On Saturday Jan 19th I got a call I never thought I would. That afternoon Matt had taken Hallie skiing and the other kids and I were doing some cleaning when I received a call from Mandy(Corey & Mindi's neighbor) to tell us that Corey had drowned at a local swimming pool while there with his family. As I heard the words they didn't seem real. I thought it was a cruel joke. As I tried to ask questions I couldn't get any words out. I wasn't sure what to say or how to react. Mandy told me that Mindi wanted us to come to the hospital before they took the body. I eventually was able to get out that I would talk to Matt and we would come. I called Matt still processing what had happened and thru broken sobs told him about the phone call. I could hear in his voice the heartbreak as he broke down. He said they would come home. After I talked to Matt I called Joy and asked her to come stay with the girls so we could go to the hospital. About an hour later she got to our house and Matt and I left. We left Liam at Nic's since I felt like he was to much for Joy. Before we were able to get to the hospital Mindi wanted to go back to their house so we headed there instead. When we got there the house was full of neighbors and friends. We immediately went to find the kids. Matt found Nathan first and just hugged him. I found the girls in their bedrooms watching the ipad still in their swimsuits. I helped them get changed into pjs and comb their hair. Little Lexi started talking about how this was the worst day of her life since her daddy died. I had a hard time holding it together. I got the girls some dinner and they continued to watch shows on their ipad. Mindi got there about that time and looked completely in shock. She came in and just hugged me we both fell apart and just held each other for a moment. I had no idea what to say and honestly at that moment I don't think I could have said anything that would make any difference anyways. She sat in a chair in the corner for most of the evening at times completely oblivious to the world around her. I made her a smoothie in an attempt to get her to eat/drink something. People came and went all evening. It seemed like hours but was only minutes. The next couple days were a blur trips to and from West Valley. Nic keeping the kids without hesitation...she was a God sent.
Matt and I were asked to do the video last minute so I made a trip down to go thru pictures and get the process started. Mindi wans't ready to go thru the pic but luckily there were some other friends there to help me. Matt stopped and bought me a scanner so I could take it with me the next morning. It was a huge blessing both Liam and Emy were so good and after 11 hours I returned home with over 200 pictures for the video. Once we got the kids to bed it was a late night going thru pics and finding music. We sorted thru pictures until the wee hours of the night. Once Matt put music to the video I couldn't watch it. It brought it to life and made the situation so much more real...Matt and I would be burying one of our best friends in the next couple days. Matt did a fantastic job picking music and the video got done just in time to go to the viewing. Matt's family came down to the viewing so we snuck away to have dinner with them. It was a nice distraction from all the sadness.
The viewing line went on forever and at 9pm they locked the doors to the church and it took until 11pm just to get thru the rest of the line. We stayed and I was so glad we did. We felt like family. It was heart breaking watching Mindi greet each person and try to take their grief from them all while she was trying to grieve herself. After the line was gone we were able to watch the movie with the family. We all cried, laughed, and just absorbed each others love and support.
The next morning was the funeral. We arrived early and help get everything set up. We both felt so drained. The line was even longer than the night before and the funeral was standing room only. We were able to be there for the family prayer. When they closed the casket it felt almost unbearable like a nightmare was somehow the true reality. Watching Mindi 8 month prego with the 3 mini Coreys' was so hard. She was nothing short of amazing. Mindi had asked Matt and some other friends to sing. I felt honored to be asked but was happy when they said they didn't need me. My parents and Nic/Ky came to the viewing and funeral. They were super helpful with the kids and I loved having them there. The song went great and everyone did a pretty good job holding it together. Hilari's talk was my favorite as she shared some great stories about Corey.
After the funeral Nic & my parents took our kids home so we could go to the graveside and luncheon. The 21 gun salute was a cool thing to see but by far the hardest part was the flag presentations to Corey's mom, Mindi, and all the kids. The thoughts crossed my mind of the years to come and all the things we will miss him for. We have always joked that Hallie & Nathan are betrothed to each other. The blessings, baptisms, weddings, and other "normal" friend get togethers, camping, and trips to the lake. Seeing Matt with him. Matt is a much more carefree version of himself when their together...I will really miss that for both of us. Im sad we'll never take the 15th wedding anniversary Alaskan cruise we talk about for so many years and other couple trips we talked about.
Thru all of this Im so grateful to have Matt by my side. We have had great conversations about death, memories of Corey, and how we are dealing with our grief. Its a funny thing...grief. Its a cycle that seems never ending. It hits both Matt and I at unexpected times but I know that will continue. But Im grateful for the memories. Corey will be missed until we meet again.
