Friday, January 27, 2023

Liam's Fight with Cancer-3 Years Remission

 Oh how I dread these scans. PTSD is a funny thing. Since the beginning of this entire cancer journey we have received nothing but good new. No metastasis, blessings and prayers told and felt that Liam would live a long and full life, tumor responded amazing to treatment, great survivor rates, directed to great doctors, and Liam was unphased by chemo. But despite that the anxiety and worry remains. The small percentage of what ifs seem to be louder as scans get closer. Matt and I have both felt like we need to talk to Liam about scans so he'll know what to expect so about a week before I mentioned then to Liam and as the week progressed he asked questions and picked his prize. I did my best not to cringle every time he asked about scans because this isn't about me but it was hard. Liam continued to seem unphased and would say he was excited for scans and the prize he picked. I have felt forever that scan results would be and Liam would do great but I had no idea how great until the day of. He asked if I'd wake him up in time to get ready since I usually just take him in his pjs and change him once we get there. He actually woke himself up just in time to get ready and after getting Hallie to the bus we headed to Primary Children's. The roads and weather were terrible but we took our time and were safe but ended up being a few minutes late. Our check in was quick since they now have you do most of it online before hand. We only waited about 5 minutes before they called us back.  The ultrasound tech asked Liam to climb up and he jumped right up on the table and lifted his shirt so she could tuck the towels in. He started explaining to the tech that he knew all the things she was going to do with her "magic wand" looking in his belly to make sure he was healthy. I was so proud of him. At one point I tried to talk to him and he told me to stop because he was focusing on being still. As she continued the ultrasound all I could hear was the continual click click to capture images. In an attempt to calm my anxiety I asked how many pictures they usually capture and she said about 60...which made me feel better. Meanwhile Liam talked her ear off about the prize he was getting for being so brave and strong for his scans. Within 10 minutes she was done. Usually it take 20-30 but that's with him not holding still and cooperating. The sweet tech was listening to him as he talked to her because she brought him some Marshall Paw Patrol stickers for being so good. Then she checked with xray and we walked right over. Liam asked the xray tech if I could be with him and she said if I wore lead that I could stand by him so you better believe I did just that. He stood there and followed all of her directions and then we were done in record time. 

As we walked out of the CPC(children's procedural center). Liam said mom lets ride the elevator and go to clinic now and we did just that. They got us back and in a room quickly. Liam again was so good to get weighed he's 41lbs and 5oz(up from 36lbs 3 oz in July)and is now 43 inches tall(2 inches taller than when we went in July). As we sat waiting for the Dr I couldn't help but feel grateful for how well the day had gone. This was going to be our first meeting with Dr Dietz since our last visit his wife had her baby unexpectedly the day before. While we waited I kept checking my health for the results from his US and Xray. Before they were up the Dr came in to introduce himself and assess Liam. As we visited he asked if I was in the medical profession because of the questions I was asking. I told him yes and that I was a NICU nurse. Then the results came thru. All the scans looked great! Our little buddy was 3 years CANCER FREE! He went thru and explained the entire report because he said he knew I'd read it even if he told me everything looked fine. Liam had a cold previous to scans and had some gunk in his lungs still and the picture was taken not at peak point but all the results were good. Then came the real shocker he said at this point we wouldn't need to do follow up anymore! I was a little caught off guard but had been praying that I would know what was best. He explained that neuroblastoma often returns in the first 2 years if it's going to and that at some point the scans are more of a risk than the cancer coming back. He said because this was the first time meeting with him that we could do some follow up in 6 months and then be done from there. He also mentioned wanting to be conscious of the trauma to the kids in doing the scans so we decided on doing a urine VMA/HVA and an assessment 6 months from now. This is the what a very happy healthy not so little boy looks like.

As we left the hospital that day I couldn't help but cry all happy tears. I can't imagine our lives without this little guy and all the light and happiness he brings to all he comes into contact with. Now home to build toy he picked out as a prize.
He recently has started loving to climb the rock wall and play in the foam pit. It's so fun to watch him find something he loves and try it out.




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